(no subject)

[jethrien]

I'm reading a book called Cheap: The High Cost of Discount Culture, which is predictably shrill but interesting nonetheless. It is, however, crystallizing a thought that I've been aware of for some time but perhaps not blatantly thinking about.

I suck at shopping.

I am really bad at a)determining what the true value of something is and b)evaluating how much I want it. I can't remember prices, I'm terrible at haggling, and I regularly fail at predicting how much I'll value something later. Chuckro knows exactly what the normal price of butter is, what the normal discount on butter is, and at what price you buy six pounds of butter on sale and stuff it in the freezer. Me? Not a clue. Been buying butter for years, Chuckro repeatedly and patiently reminds me how much is too much to pay for butter, it doesn't stick.

I have a closet full of clothes, half of which I adore and are wearing out and I cannot find replacements for, half of which are kind of shoddy or don't fit quite right or aren't actually as stylish as they seemed in the store. I came home from Italy with a dress that's really cute but I subsequently realized isn't as appropriate for the office as I hoped, a wildly impractical but super awesome coat I know I paid too much money for because of the aforementioned sucking at haggling, and a purse that's of excellent quality but is turning out to not fit my needs as well as hoped. All of which I do really like but probably only bought because I was on vacation and I knew there was no chance of ever buying them again. Meanwhile, there were a handful of inexpensive trinkets that I didn't buy because I felt like I was spending too much money and now wish I'd gotten.

I make bad snap decisions. Aware of this, I will over research and dither until I get sick of myself and make a bad snap decision at the end anyway. (When I was a kid, this led to endless fruitless shopping trips. I've gotten better about settling so I get out of the store faster, but I don't think the actual success rate of acquiring things I love at a price comensurate with the value I place on the item.) Frequently things turn out well, but they also turn out badly frequently as well. I don't think I've bought a pair of pants I was actually happy with in three years. My coworkers seem to be able to dress themselves without remorse like grown up people do. Why is it that I'm so bad at this?

Comments

[wavilyem.livejournal.com]

I think I can relate to a lot of what you're saying. For example, I'm sure I paid at least a few hundred dollars more for my car than I needed to because I really didn't want to go through the whole rigamorole of pretending I didn't like the car, threaten to walk out of the dealership, etc. But even though I didn't do enough pricing research, I spent a lot of time test driving other cars and knew what features I wanted and used that to determine exactly what model, what trim level, what color, and what accessories I wanted before walking in the door. So at least in the end, I got exactly what I wanted. Perhaps what might help you is not to worry about the shopping logistics, pricing, and haggling until you've spent enough time figuring out what type of dress, purse, etc. you'd ideally want. That way when you are pressured to make a snap decision you'll have a better basis for deciding how useful a product would be for you.

[jethrien.livejournal.com]

Well, the thing is, with a car there are a specific set of criteria. You can look them up, figure out which you want, walk in and say "I want that one." I've actually done fine with defined tasks like this - I'm very happy with my camera, my computer, and the package trip I just took to Italy.

But with a purse or dress, when I say "I want a blue sparkly dress that's bias cut with a halter top that ends at the knee", that doesn't mean I'll actually find one. Or that if I do, it will fit, fit well, and be an appropriate price and quality. I've actually given up to some extent on setting too many criteria. I've discovered that if I go out with a specific idea in mind, I will never find it, and thus get to the day before the event with no dress and be forced to buy whatever I find next.