It can never be simple

Chuckro lined up an elaborate set of contractors to do all the various work in a specific order.

One just failed to show.

Semi-fortunately, we had a natural pause in the work because we were planning to go away for a long weekend. Apparently now we will not actually be going away for a chunk of it, because the friggin' contractor has to be rescheduled for Friday morning instead of right now. Since it's probably too late to cancel, we're going to need to eat one of the hotel nights.

Sigh.

Meditation

I've started this meditation practice. 15 min when I wake up, 15 min some time after lunch (in theory). I'm not actually managing all the after lunch sessions, and I'm not sure how well those are working. They're supposed to be energizing but sometimes leave me groggy.

The morning meditations, though...wow is there a difference. I don't handle mornings well. I never have, even as a child. The previous job, going on four years ago, left me with a stress-based mild case of IBS that never really went away. So basically, I spend most mornings in a fog, nauseated and incoherent. Like, when I'm genuinely sick, I can't usually tell until around 10am or so.

But when I do the morning meditation...this must be what normal people feel like. I'm able to have complete thoughts. I don't want to throw up. Food is appealing. It's amazing!

I'm off this week, because of long story involving work vacation days and the end of the quarter. I tried to skip it on Monday. I was a disastrous anxious ball of anxiety until I'd dropped ARR off at school and actually did my meditation. Because my default state of greeting the day is a nauseated fit of existential angst, which the meditation appears to dispel.

Sooooo...I guess I will be doing this forever then.

Books

I've been on a re-reading kick lately. Lots of old favorites here.

#9. Adiamante by L.E. Modesitt, Jr. 5. I don't know why I find this rather bleak tale of ecological disaster and political brinkmanship comforting, but I do? I think there's a weird meditative quality and an underlying hopefulness that sacrifice will bring results. Re-read.

#10. Oath of Gold by Elizabeth Moon. 5. The conclusion of The Deed of Paksenarrion, this semi-martyr's tale is I think one of the better epic fantasies out there. Paks' growth from trauma to simple, steadfast strength is gorgeously done, and the unspooling mystery of the missing king intertwines beautifully. Re-read.

#11. Someone Like Me by M.R.Carey. 4.5. This is another one of those books where you figure out what's going on a long time before the protagonists do. An abused ex-wife and a traumatized teenager both think they're going crazy, but...you'll figure it out. Beautifully taut writing. Docking half a point for the insurmountable obstacles placed to hem in characters and then easily surmounted once the main action is done.

#12. A Study in Scarlet Women by Sherry Thomas. 4.5. Delightful distaff Sherlock, who is all the more compelling for making some major social missteps and actually suffering consequences for them.

#13. Death by Cliche by Bob Defendi. 2. Neither as clever nor as feminist as it thinks it is.

#14/15/16. Magic's Pawn/Magic's Promise/Magic's Price by Mercedes Lackey. 5. This is the most emo, Marty-Stu hurt/comfort original fic ever written. I don't care i love it fight me Re-read.

#17. Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn. 5. Damn, but this woman can write. Unlikable reporter goes back to her even more unlikable town and tries to solve a serial killer and everything is SO MUCH WORSE than even you think it could be. And every sentence is just so beautifully crafted, it aches.

#18. Stress Less, Accomplish More by Emily Fletcher. 3. I'm not quite sure how to rate this, in that I actually am finding the meditation techniques helpful. But on the other hand, this book contains about 10 pages of actual content and the rest is total filler.

#19. By the Sword by Mercedes Lackey. 5. Meant to re-read a couple favorite chapters, ended up re-reading the whole thing.

#20. Winds of Fate by Mercedes Lackey. 5. Same thing.